conversations that fortune cookies must hear

This may be a fluke but the last couple times Ive been in the Chinese restaurant here my fortune cookie has been freaking me out!!!

Seriously, have you ever gotten 3 fortunes in a row of eating at the same place? And then a 4th one out of sequence but still basically reiterating the same message of the previous encounters. Is it fate? Is it someone standing in the kitchen laughing their butt off at the quizzical expression plastered to your face? Is it a conspiracy? Or do fortune cookies really know things they are not telling us right up front.

Instead they have to hide all these ulterior meanings in crispy little white banner like sayings that you can alter depending on the tone of your mood, if you are feeling serious you can read your fortune with "at work" behind it, or if you are rather feeling a little frisky you can add "in bed" behind the saying (really now admit it we have ALL done this)

Or how about the hypothesis about eating your cookie and saving your fortune if you want it to come true. If it is true and you leave your fortune behind and do not consume the cookie will you have no luck in your favor?

If that is so then my brother and I had no fortunes when we were small. In fact when the older chinese restaurant used to operate in the little cubby hole where this place now resides Im sure they found lots of fortunes when they moved out...... we used to think it was too much fun while the owner (and our mom) was not paying attention to stick our fortunes into the backrests of the overlapping vinyl red cushions that served as the seats. We still ate our cookies though, so maybe luck didnt abandon us entirely.

I'll bet you are wondering what exactly those fortunes read? Well I can tell you because I carry them with me in my wallet. So I can look at them everyday to remind me that things like this do happen. And they can be eerily correct in a very round about way.

#1 you will soon vacation in a place of cool climate
#2 make time for a relaxing vacation
#3 need some adventure and enjoyment? take a vacation

Im not kidding! And last (but not least)

#4 traveling at this time would be a good investment of time & money

Seriously if you doubt me just ask to see my fortunes in my wallet its all spelled out for me! Oh by the way......Im going to Norway in September! Skal!!! (Cheers!)

Unbirthday party

An unbirthday party is an okay thing if you are not one in need of a lot of attention to celebrate the day you were born. I didnt really have a birthday party this year. But thats only because I am spreading it out, enjoying the entire month at my leisure. The planets are aligned in the proper spaces for fate to determine the year ahead of me and many changes are already taking place in the little corner of my world.

Lately I feel I am similar to the overly animated mad hatter at Alices tea party. (Hatters were mad because they handled mercury, a liquid metal that soaks into the skin quicky, in the production of making fur hats) Except instead of changing chairs like in the movie my qualm is coats. Liquid rain that is so wet here in Sitka that I can easily drench 3 coats a day. Yes, thats 3 coats per working day. I am out in all the elements: rain/sleet/snow/hail, sometimes occuring approximately at the same time. Which like mercury can cause madness after prolonged exposure.

Or maybe beyond working hours I become the doormouse: Another mad creature who takes tea all of the time because he lives in a state of frozen time. He also sleeps a lot. Which is all I require for myself after a long grueling day at work. A nice warm cup of tea and some hibernation.

I think its time to invest in a 110% "waterproof" jacket. A birthday- er unbirthday gift to myself. After all January is the month of my birth. Anyone know any good brands?

Intimidation 2009

I am sitting on the edge of our local Swan lake unting my iceskates when I see a rowdy group a kids around the age of 12-13 pushing each other, yelling at each other, even so much as spitting at one another. Geez I think was I ever like this?!!

All of the sudden the young man in the group (the only one in a swarm of girls I realize) yells to me, "Hey dont I know you?!!" And he comes over and plops down next to me on the frozen grass.

I smile at him and say "no I dont think I know you, but do you recognize me from somewhere around town maybe?"

"No, actually I dont know you, but I had to get away from those girls they are being pushy!" He admits sheepishly to me. "Its fun sometimes, but at the same time sometimes its not so much fun." He explains further.

I look toward the girls, "yeah girls can be a little intimidating sometimes." Then think to myself that sometimes we girls can be down right scary but this is the first guy in a while that has used me as an escape, a safe haven almost. That doesnt happen too often I point out to myself.

Do I come across as rowdy, screaming, spitting, freakishly intimidating as these girls were being to this very logical little man? I sure hope not.

Then again, intimidation gives myself a blanket of security from those guys that you need to be intimidating towards. Its finding that balance of the boundary to let the good guys in.

This year is a whole new chance to redefine what other people think about your own intimidation level. Whether it is in a much needed place or if we can make the boards in the symbolic fence stretch a little to let who you do not wish to intimidate through.

And dont worry if you are a good guy: Im not at all like those girls, really I can let you in. And unless you make me really really really mad, I wont spit on you either. :)

Happy New Year!!!!